Putting yourself out there...

"How bad could it be?" I asked myself, as I decided to write my first novel.

Little did I know how bad failing could be, especially with a world wide audience. I recently looked up the "worst" books sold by Amazon. The Shadow God by Aaron Rayburn is one that has become notoriously famous with 20 single star reviews and each of the five star reviews dripping with the most cruel sarcasm I could imagine. As I read through the reviews I couldn't help but feel for poor Aaron Rayburn, who dared to dream far bigger than he was capable of flying and fell flat on his face for all the world to laugh at. And while C. Dennis Moore's books have done slightly better, nothing he's done has received as much acclaim and notice as his crucifixion of Mr. Rayburn.

On the other hand there is also Essentials of the Internet which is currently ranked #9,867,298 on Amazon, which is as far as the numbers go currently, I think.

It's a cruel world out there. It's difficult to gather enough courage to possibly be mocked by 75,000,000 people like Rebecca Black for her Friday song. (Perhaps not all of those people think of her song as a fun way to torture others, but a lot of the reviews suggested that might be case.)

I can now understand a little better why most people don't publish books, write songs, paint, or publish their own creative works, whatever they may be.

I recently heard a quote about faith. It compared faith to that courage of a baby bird who jumps from the safety of the nest not knowing beforehand how to fly.

I love and admire the courage of those people who dare not only to dream big but to chase those dreams that are far bigger than they have the ability to reach.

I'm glad that my friends haven't tried too hard to save me from myself (as Mr. Moore might have been trying to do for Mr. Rayburn). I haven't hit the ground yet, though I may have hit a couple of the branches on the way down. I don't know if I'd have the courage or strength to climb back up the tree to try again if I ever got to that point. As it is, it's easy to start doubting. It's easier to be done and say, "I've given it a go, and now I can move on." But I want to help champion those dreamers, who against all odds still tried. I want to carry that torch, daring the world to laugh at how reckless and foolish I am.

Maybe it's good that I have an extra thick ego, or naivety, to help protect me from "reality." Because someday I'd like to grow up to be more like Robby Novak, who might not have as many views as Rebecca Black, but who in spite of having brittle bone disease still knows how to dance and help others to smile.

May we all learn how to dream a little bigger and accomplish a little more.